Something Borrowed, Something "Blue"
Have you ever played with a lead balloon? I haven't either, and I assume (though I could be wrong) that it's absolutely no fun. The reason I ask is, well, I've been sitting with a lead balloon in my lap for about a week now, and I'm totally unsure of what to do with it. Am I suppose to throw it, or use it as some fanciful decoration in the House of Texas? I simply don't know.
Of course, "lead balloon" is a euphamism for something else. It usually refers to a situation that doesn't work, for example: "Well, that joke went over like a lead balloon." I tend to use it for a situation I don't want to deal with. Example: "Your drinking is one more lead balloon." An even better example: "My brother's wedding is another lead balloon in my life." And it is.
Time for a bit of a story. (Yay!... or not.) Mitch, the middle son of my family, is getting married on April 19th. To say I'm happy is an understatement, he and Stacy have been dating for over eight years. Eight years! Hell, most of us have a hard time imaging eight weeks let alone eight years! So yes, I'm very happy for him. They deserve each other. Seriously, they do. And don't try to read any bitterness or resentment (two "glowing" trademarks of queer society) into this. There isn't any. If anything, this "lead balloon" got me thinking.
I haven't been home in over a year, and while a wedding is a perfect reason to escape the confines of the Jungle, it isn't an oppertunity I plan to persue. You see, my family is a bit of a disjointed mess, and this wedding REEKS of disaster. (To be clear the disaster isn't Mitch and Stacy, it's the mess surrounding the wedding.) Pluse, disaster aside, I don't feel like answering millions of questions that are bound to be asked. And I'm sure any fool knows what those are.
"How's New York?" Great! Couldn't be better. (Sip drink in silence and pray they go away.) "Got a boyfriend/girlfriend yet?" Yeah, I do. HE'S wonderful. (Deeper into the drink.) "So, when do you plan to get married?" (Pause. Beat. Smile.)
And then the Beast that is Texas lurches forward and attacks that fool crazy enough to ask that question, thus rendering my brother's wedding on the evening news. Publicity! Fame! And jail time. And why? Simple. I'm a rabid, feral, staunch supporter of gay marriage, and in the backwoods gay isn't something you mention, let alone marriage. So instead of running off to book my flight, I sit with the lead balloon and wonder just were I'm going to use it to decorate the House of Texas.
I'm not going to let this become a rant on marriage, the need for the legalization of it, or blabber on about the need for equality. Let's face it, we all know, gay or straight, these issues need to be addressed, but there's a time and a place for these things. For the record your brother's wedding is not the proper time or place (and to be honest I don't think Pride is the time to mention these things either). It's called class and edicate. I'm only going to say one thing about the whole marriage thing (for now). The constitution states I have the right to the pursuit of happiness, irregardless of the fact that my happiness might step on your religious beliefs (there's an amendment that solves that problem too). Enough said, I think (again, for now).
Actively Support... PORNO?!?
For all you kiddies a bit bored during the week and need something to get over the mid-week blues, you should check out 9TH AVENUE SALOON (between 46th and 47th on 9th Ave) on Wednesday night. A good friend of mine, Manny (who just celebrated his birthday), runs the bar that night. And guess what? From 9 to 11 you can usually oogle a porn star or go-go boy! Now, wait, wait, it gets better. You can play BINGO! Did I lose you? Hope not, because by playing bingo you'll be helping local gay orginizations raise money. The orginzations range from theatrical to medical, just ask Manny at the bar each week who it helps. Oh, and a word of advice, don't mention being a Red Sox fan (if you are). So go out and enjoy a cocktail or two and help support the community.
PLAYLIST OF THE WEEK
One last thing guys, here's some more music to get you through the week.
1. Shut Your Eyes - Snow Patrol
2. Good Day - The Click Five
3. Just Some Guy - Anthony Rapp
4. Rollerskate Skinny - Old 97s
5. Magick - Klaxons
6. Rogues - Incubus
7. Tounge Tied - Eve6
8. Million Years - Teddy Geiger
9. Lights and Music - Cut Copy
10. Weekend Wars - MGMT
Until next time,
- Texas
